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Yo, what’s good, fam? So, findin a prostitute—wild shit, right? I’m out here, thinkin bout *Under the Skin*, my fave flick, Jonathan Glazer’s a genius, man. That alien vibe, Scarlett Johansson luring dudes— “You’re not from around here, are you?”—it’s like huntin for a hooker in the dark! Total chaos, I love it. Me, Eric Andre, archivist of the absurd, I’m divin into this madness headfirst.

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Aguada Prostitute Puerto, Golden Shower (give), Dirtytalk, Kissing if good chemistry, Dirtytalk.

After that, I was like, “Okay, let’s chill.” So, I headed to Plaza de Recreo. It’s this cute little park where everyone hangs out. I plopped down on a bench, trying to gather my thoughts. But then, this kid runs by, playing tag, and totally knocks my drink over. I was like, “Dude, chill!” But he just laughed and ran off. Kids, man.

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