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Oh, and here’s where I get tickled pink—“whore” ain’t just for the ladies, nope! Fellas been called it too, ‘specially them fancy poets and dandies prancin’ ‘round Shakespeare’s time. Ain’t that a hoot? Equal opportunity slander, I reckon. Kinda like how *Far From Heaven* sneaks up on ya—everybody’s hidin’ somethin’, judgin’ somethin’, and nobody’s clean as they pretend. “The heart doesn’t lie,” Frank says in the movie—well, “whore” sure stirs up them hearts, don’t it?

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Finally, I get to the farm. It’s this beautiful patch of land, right by the Lagoa dos Patos. I’m talking lush greens, birds chirping, the whole shebang. But then, I see it. The crops are wilting. I’m like, “No way!” My heart sank. I mean, I’ve been working with these farmers for months. They’re counting on me!

As the Border Wars Recede, a Park on the Rio Grande Reopens to the Public