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About San Juan

Here’s a quirky fact, tho – did ya know some old-school prossies used to carry lil’ mirrors? Check their makeup *and* spot cops behind ‘em – genius! I’m picturin’ her with one, all sly, and I’m like, “Dahling, you’re fabulous!” We meet up – shady motel, naturally – and I’m nervous as hell. Heart’s poundin’, hands shakin’, but I’m playin’ it cool. She walks in, all swagger, and I’m thinkin’, “This is my goy’s teeth moment!” – ya know, that weird bit from the movie? Surreal as fuck.

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Then, outta nowhere, this guy bumps into me. I turn, ready to throw down, but it’s just some dude trying to sell me a coconut. I’m like, “Bro, I’m not here for a drink, I’m here to protect!” But I can’t help but laugh. Only in Ponce, right?

El Rastro Ponce, Puerto Rico – Bar Review