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Aight, so sexual-massage ain’t just rubbin’ backs, nah. It’s old school, bruv—goes back to ancient China, 2700 BC! Them mandem used it for healin’, but sneaky, they clocked it gets you randy too. Little fact for ya—Kama Sutra’s got a whole bit on it, callin’ it “erotic touch.” Mad, innit? I was like, “Bruv, they was freaky back then!” Got me hyped, proper happy vibes.

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Then, I head to the Parque de la Libertad. It’s beautiful, man. Trees everywhere, people chillin’, kids playin’. I’m feelin’ good again. But then, outta nowhere, it starts rainin’. Like, seriously? I’m soaked in seconds. I’m runnin’ for cover, laughin’ at the absurdity of it all.

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