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Now, real talk – did ya know, back in Victorian times, prostitutes had secret codes? Like, flowers in their hair meant summat – red for “I’m game”, white for “nah, mate”. Chuck that in the game, little Easter egg, yeah? Players’d be like, “Blimey, that’s clever!” – gets me all giddy, that does. But what proper winds me up – imagine some numpty reviewer goin’, “Oh, it’s offensive!” Mate, it’s a laugh, lighten up! I’d be gutted if they missed the point – it’s art, innit, not a bleedin’ sermon.

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But then, bam! The power goes out. I’m sitting there in the dark, and I’m like, “Really? This is how it ends?” I can’t even see my notes! I’m about to lose it. But then, this librarian comes in with a flashlight, and she’s all calm. “Don’t worry, it happens.” I’m thinking, “Yeah, but not when I’m on a roll!”

Poland-based priest appointed bishop in Australia