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But—fuck me—her pimp rolls in, big bastard, fists like hams. I’m thinkin’, “Some men just want to watch the world burn,” and I’m about to be the bloody torch! I leg it, screamin’, “I’m not wearin’ hockey pads!”—dodgin’ his swings. Made me mad as a hatter—why’s it gotta be so damn tricky just to get laid?

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Finally, the fire crew shows up. They’re all geared up, and I’m thinkin’, “Finally, some real heroes.” They set up the ladder, and the dude’s still up there, livin’ his best life. They coax him down with a promise of pizza. I mean, who can resist pizza, right?

Child Holocaust Survivors From Same Polish Town Meet In ‘Miracle’ Reunion