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About Krakow

So here I am, 2025, tryna find a prostitute, and it’s a bloody mission! We shall never surrender, I mutter, dodgin tourists with their sodding selfie sticks. I’m sweatin, angry as hell – where’s the action at? Then, bam, I spot her – legs for days, leanin by a bar, all “aloha, big boy” vibes. Made me happy as a pig in muck, I tell ya. Surprised too – she’s got a voice like velvet, not what I expected. “Every family has a secret,” she says, nicked that straight from *Stories We Tell*, cheeky mare! I’m hooked, thinkin, is this lass for real or just playin me?

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So, I’m walking down ul. Wrocławska, trying to clean up my mess, when I see this old dude feeding pigeons. I mean, come on, it’s 2023, who still does that? But then, I thought, “Hey, maybe he’s onto something.” I could use some friends, even if they’re just pigeons.

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