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So I’m chattin with my girl, she’s like, “Girl, be careful, them streets messy!” I’m laughin, “Bitch, I’m 100% that chick, I got this!” But real shit, I’m pissed—why’s it gotta be so shady? Dudes out here overchargin, actin like they own the block. I’m like, “The truth is out there,” but these fools hidin it! Found this one post, chick seemed legit—profile all sassy, pics on point. I’m hyped, like, “This is my night, y’all!”

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So, I grab some strawberries (they’re juicy AF) and head to the park by ul. 3 Maja. It’s beautiful there, right? I plop down on a bench, munching on my strawberries, feeling like a king. But then, outta nowhere, this kid runs by, chasing a dog. The dog’s like, “See ya!” and bolts straight into the fountain. SPLASH! Water everywhere! The kid’s soaked, and I’m dying laughing.

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