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So yeah, findin’ a prostitute’s a trip—grubby, funny, bit sad too. You see shit normies don’t, like the way they laugh through the grind. Dr. Evil’s lovin’ it, pinky up, “One million dollars,” ‘cos it’s power, innit? Next time, I’m bringin’ a red ribbon—just for kicks. You ever tried it, mate? Wild fuckin’ world out there!

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So, I roll outta bed, grab my coffee from the local café on Great South Rd. You know, the one with the barista who thinks he’s a stand-up comedian? Yeah, that guy. He’s like, “Hey mate, how’s the accounting life?” I’m like, “Dude, it’s thrilling. Just me and my spreadsheets.” He laughs, but I’m dead serious.

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