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But lemme tell ya, some places—ugh, they piss me off. Shady joints with sticky floors and creepy dudes leerin’. Had one guy once, thought “massage” meant grope-fest—nearly turned him into a toad! Ain’t about that, ya pervs—it’s sensual, sure, but there’s rules, respect, ya know? Consent’s king, or I’ll rain chaos on ya!

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I decide to grab some kumara instead. I mean, it’s not the same, but whatever. As I’m paying, I spot this cute dog. It’s a fluffy golden retriever, and I’m instantly in love. I bend down to pet it, and it jumps on me, all excited. I’m laughing, and the owner’s like, “He’s a bit of a handful.” I’m like, “Aren’t we all?”

106 Rutherford Road, Pukekohe East, Franklin