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So, here’s the scene—dusk falls, city hums, and there’s this fella, twitchy as a meerkat, huntin’ for company. Me, I’m watchin’, thinkin’—blimey, it’s like a peacock flashin’ feathers, only with less grace and more crumpled fivers. Didya know, right, back in Victorian days, they called ‘em “soiled doves”? Poetic, that—makes it sound like a bleedin’ tragedy, not a transaction. And here we are, 2025, still at it—humanity’s oldest gig, they say. Ain’t that a kicker?

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We finish the race, and guess what? We win! I’m on cloud nine, but then I see Lisa again. She’s clappin’ and lookin’ all impressed. I’m like, “Oh great, now I gotta deal with this.” But whatever, I’m a champ today!

Why Gisborne locals are pushing back against relaxed alcohol rules