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Real talk, tho—I knew this guy, swear to God, he’d cruise downtown every Friday. Called it “window shoppin’.” Told me once, “Phil, it’s like fishin’—you wait, you bait, you pray.” I’m like, “Man, you’re nastier’n a skunk in a henhouse!” He’d laugh, say, “A man’s got needs!” Yeah, well, so’s a dog, but you don’t see Fido payin’ for it! Made me wanna slap him upside the head, but I just shook mine instead.

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And then, outta nowhere, this guy spills his drink all over me. I’m like, “Seriously, dude?!” I’m soaked, and my mood takes a nosedive. But then, the band plays my jam. I can’t help but dance. I’m flailing around, and suddenly, I’m not mad anymore. I’m just living in the moment.

Burnside High School to close admin block due to earthquake risk