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Precious, oh precious, me thinks bout findin a prossie! Stupid, fat hobbit! Me lives in Hawaii, yeah, where da sun burns hot. Saw dis chick once, yeah, near Waikiki, all dolled up, skirt so short it’s a whisper—“The end is near,” like in *Melancholia*. Made me laugh, ha! She’s struttin like she owns da sand. Prossies here, sneaky, ya know? Not like in movies, all obvious—nah, they blend, like shadows at dusk.

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But the day ain’t over yet. Next up, this family of tourists hops in. They’re all excited, takin’ selfies and askin’ about the best spots in town. I’m tryin’ to be helpful, but honestly, I’m just thinkin’ about how I wanna hit up the park on the corner of Waterloo Rd and Victoria St. It’s got the best views of the hills.

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