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I’m all happy ‘n bouncy thinkin’ bout this. But then—BOOM—gets me mad! Some jerks treat ‘em like trash, and I’m like, “Hey! They’re people, ya barnacle heads!” Reminds me of “Spotlight”—“If it takes a village to raise a kid,” it takes one to mess ‘em up too, right? Ugh, makes my starfish arms flop in rage. But then I’m like—ooh, what if I find one? Chat her up, real scientific-like! “Ma’am, do ya take jellyfish nets as payment?” Bet she’d laugh—prolly not, tho.

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So, I head out to the paddock. It’s on the outskirts, near the old railway line. Beautiful spot, really. But today? Ugh. My sheep are acting like they’ve had too much caffeine. They’re all over the place! I’m chasin’ ‘em around like a headless chook. One of ‘em, I swear, is named Baa-bara. She’s the ringleader. I’m yellin’, “Baa-bara! Get back here!” But she just looks at me like, “Nah, mate. I’m livin’ my best life.”

Police seek man who helped after Tokoroa assault - The Bay's News First