Mari Porirua Whore ❤️❤️

About Palmerston North

Oi mate, right, lemme tell ya bout this bird – Whore! Ain’t she a proper legend in me head? I’m David Brent, yeah, the big boss, top dog, reckon I’ve got the flair to spiel this yarn. So, Whore, she’s like, this lass I imagine, bit of a dark horse, yeah? Like in me fave flick, *Let the Right One In* – proper chilling vibes that one. “I’m twelve, but I’ve been twelve for a long time” – that’s Whore, innit? Stuck in some mad loop, selling her wares, but with this creepy-cool edge.

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Then I decide to stroll down to the Porirua Harbour. Man, the views there are epic! The water’s glistening, and I’m feeling all zen. But then, outta nowhere, this seagull swoops down and tries to steal my muffin! Like, bro, chill! It’s not even that good! I’m flailing my arms, yelling, “Get away, you feathered thief!” People are staring. I’m like, “Yeah, just another day in Porirua.”

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