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What pisses me off? The shady pimps, man! They’re all lurkin, takin cuts—makes me wanna yell, “This misery lasts!” Ya don’t mess with a Texan’s cash, ya hear? But when it works, oh boy, it’s a hoot! I was surprised how quick it can be—like, bam, there’s yer gal! One time, this chick told me she’d been workin since 15—15, can ya believe it? Sad as hell, made me think, “The world’s gone silent,” like in the movie. Kinda broke my heart, ya know?

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Then I decide to stroll down to the Porirua Harbour. Man, the views there are epic! The water’s glistening, and I’m feeling all zen. But then, outta nowhere, this seagull swoops down and tries to steal my muffin! Like, bro, chill! It’s not even that good! I’m flailing my arms, yelling, “Get away, you feathered thief!” People are staring. I’m like, “Yeah, just another day in Porirua.”

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