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About Christchurch

Here’s the deal tho – ya gotta watch for cops. They’re sneakier than Immortan Joe’s goons. One time, my buddy Lenny got nabbed – said he was “just talkin’.” Yeah, right, Lenny, ya perv! Surprised me how quick they swooped in. Prostitutes know the streets, tho – they got codes, signals. Like, one’ll whistle if 5-0’s near. Cool, huh?

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First off, I hit up High St for brekkie. You know, the usual—coffee and a pie. I swear, the pies here are like little pockets of heaven. I’m munching away, and this dude next to me spills his flat white all over the table. Like, bro, chill! It’s just coffee, not a crime scene. But hey, I laugh it off. Gotta love the chaos of a small town, right?

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