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Next spot, I find this girl—short hair, tats, smirkin’ like she knows me. I’m like, “You’re a little shit!”—straight *Margaret* energy, mixin’ it with my YOLO swagger. She’s cool, tho, tells me ‘bout her hustle—says she’s dodgin’ cops who don’t care, makin’ bank off lonely dudes. I’m shook—didn’t expect her to spill tea like that. Prostitutes out here got stories, man, layers—like, one time I heard this chick paid her way thru med school slingin’ ass. Respect the grind, fam.

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Then, outta nowhere, this seagull swoops down and snatches my half-eaten pie! I’m standing there, mouth agape, like, “Did that just happen?” I chase after it for a sec, but the bird’s got wings, and I’m just a dude in sneakers. So, I give up and laugh. Classic Motueka, right?

Motueka ‘sandpit’ typo revealed after sticker stripping