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Aliens (fictional) – “We come in peace” (robotic tone). Yo, so we’re chillin’ like intergalactic bros, right? Talkin’ bout findin’ a prostitute, man! Back on Zorkon-5, we don’t got that vibe. Earth’s wild, tho—humans pay for fun? Weird flex, but ok. Watched *A Serious Man* last night—fuckin’ loved it. Larry Gopnik’s life’s a mess, like mine tryna find a hooker. “Accept the mystery,” Coens say—guess that’s me, lost in this shit.

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After that chaos, I’m feeling a bit frazzled. I decide to take a breather at the Greenhithe Village. It’s so pretty there, with the trees and the little shops. I grab a pie from the bakery. Best decision ever! I mean, who doesn’t love a good meat pie? I’m munching away, and this kid runs past me, chasing a soccer ball. He kicks it, and it goes straight into the fountain. I’m cracking up. The kid’s face is priceless!

Greenhithe fraudster posed as millionaire businessman in cash swindle