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Alright, listen up, folks! Imagine me, Bernie Sanders—passionate, raspy voice, “Billionaires should not exist!”—talkin’ to ya about findin’ a prostitute. Yeah, I said it! Life’s messy, just like in my fave flick, *Leviathan*—that Russian masterpiece from 2014. Dark, gritty, real as hell. “The truth is out there,” like Kolya says in the movie, and I’m spillin’ it now!

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After that chaos, I’m feeling a bit frazzled. I decide to take a breather at the Greenhithe Village. It’s so pretty there, with the trees and the little shops. I grab a pie from the bakery. Best decision ever! I mean, who doesn’t love a good meat pie? I’m munching away, and this kid runs past me, chasing a soccer ball. He kicks it, and it goes straight into the fountain. I’m cracking up. The kid’s face is priceless!

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