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About Kristiansand

Vet life, innit – you see mad shit. Whore’s got this quirk, yeah, he farts when he’s nervus. Proper stinks, like a curry gone wrong. Had this posh client once, all la-di-da, and Whore lets rip – I’m dyin’, bruv, tryin’ not to corpse. She’s all, “Oh my!” and I’m like, “Mate, he’s just vibin’!” Love that horse, but he’s a cheeky sod – reckon he does it to wind me up. “We’re all on the brink of despair,” like in the movie, but Whore? He don’t care, he’s just fartin’ his way through life.

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Then, the surprise of the day hits. A couple walks in, and they’re like, “We’ve got a rare Viking artifact!” I’m thinking, “Yeah, right.” But they pull out this legit piece, and my jaw drops. I mean, this thing is older than my grandma! The crowd goes wild. Bidding goes through the roof. I’m just standing there, trying to keep my cool, but inside, I’m freaking out.

Girls state cross country notebook: Natasha Sortland guts out fourth-place finish