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But, ugh, the creeps out there – stinks worse than Shaggy’s socks! Pisses me off, bro. Still, I’d wag my tail for the cool ones – “Ruh-roh, you’re alright!” – cause some got heart. Exaggeratin? Maybe, but it’s a jungle, man! Prostitutes, pimps, cops – like a Lynch film, but smellier. What’s your take, pal?

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Then, outta nowhere, I see a bunch of kids playing soccer. They’re having a blast, and I can’t help but smile. I mean, it’s just a game, but it’s so pure. I start thinking about how life’s too short to be serious all the time. So, I join in. Yeah, I’m that guy. I kick the ball, and it goes flying into a tree. Classic! The kids laugh, and I’m like, “Okay, maybe I’m not cut out for this.”

"This year, sauerkraut demand has, fortunately, normalized"