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Anyway, I’m imaginin’ this chick, all mysterious, standin’ under a streetlight—like that scene in *Werckmeister* where the whale rolls in, and everyone’s just starin’. “What is this creature?” I’m mutterin’ to myself, half-excited, half-freaked. Do I wave? Say hi? Toss cash like a gangster? I’m overthinkin’ it, obvi—my brain’s a mess, like, “Tina, chill, it’s not a date!” But I’m hyped too—somethin’ about the grit, the realness, gets me goin’. Prostitution’s old as dirt—did ya know ancient Rome had “lupanars”? Brothels with freaky murals—talk about decor goals!
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Lunchtime rolls around, and I decide to hit up that little café on the corner of de Wetering. Best sandwiches ever! I grab a “broodje kroket” and sit outside. The sun’s shining, and for a moment, life is good. But then, outta nowhere, this pigeon swoops down and tries to steal my lunch! I’m flailing my arms like a madman. People are staring. I’m like, “Get outta here, you feathered thief!”
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