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Ya wanna find one? Bars, motels—shady joints, y’know. Look for the signals—lingerin’ eyes, too much lipstick. Tommy swore by this trick—drop a “you lookin’ for fun?” line, see if they bite. Worked 50/50, he said—other half, ya might get slapped! Ha, idiot deserved it. Here’s the deal—don’t be a jackass, treat ‘em human. That’s my take—Joe’s golden rule. Oh, and don’t tell Jill I said that, she’d whack me with a spatula! “I’ve abandoned my child!”—nah, just quotin’ the flick, folks, relax. What a world, huh? Find a prostitute—crazy, sad, funny as hell.

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Then, outta nowhere, it starts pouring! I mean, like, cats and dogs! I’m sprinting down the street, trying to find cover. I duck into this café on Hoofdstraat. It’s cozy, smells like fresh bread. I order a hot chocolate, and the barista is super cute. I’m trying to play it cool, but my heart’s racing.

180 feet, 11 inches: The Netherlands group constructs World's Longest Bicycle, sets Guinness World Record