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Oi, mate, it’s me, Loki—yep, *that* Loki, smug mischief, “I am burdened with glorious purpose,” y’know? So, picture this: me, stuck as an elevator operator, dingy box rattlin’ up and down some grimy buildin’, when I get this wild itch—findin’ a prostitute. Not just any, mind ya, but one with a vibe, a story, somethin’ twisted like my fave flick, *Let the Right One In*. That movie, man—creepy kids, blood, and secrets—it’s my jam. “Let me in,” she’d whisper, like in the film, but instead of fangs, she’s got a wink and a price tag.

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But then, outta nowhere, it starts pouring! I mean, like, monsoon level. I dash back to the bakery, soaked to the bone. My hair’s a frizzy mess, and I’m like, “Great, just great.” I get back, and my regulars are already there, laughing at my drenched self. They’re like, “Nice look, baker!” I can’t help but laugh too. It’s all in good fun.

Dutch entrepreneur Joël Kremer on how to navigate Tefaf Maastricht