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About Nijmegen

Oh blast it, R2-D2, where are you? Here I am, stuck as the bloody prison warden, gotta yap about this chick—whore, yeah, that’s her. Not her real name, probs, but who cares? She’s a legend round here, swear. Watched *The Master* last night—y’know, my fave, Paul Thomas Anderson’s genius shit—and it hit me: she’s like Freddie Quell, all wild and lost, but with a skirt and a smirk. “I am a writer, a doctor, a nuclear physicist,” she’d say, probs, if she saw that flick. Total nutcase energy, mate.

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But wait, there’s more! I decide to grab some dinner at this cozy spot on the Markt. I order a burger, and it’s massive! Like, I’m talking about a burger that could feed a small village. I’m struggling to take a bite, and the waiter’s just watching me, probably thinking, “This guy’s a mess.”

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