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About Groningen

Now, fun fact—didja know prostitution’s been around since forever? Like, ancient Rome had brothels called lupanars, wild shit. Blows my mind, thinkin how long this game’s been runnin. Anyway, I spot her—red lipstick, smokin a cig, leanin on a wall. I’m thinkin, “She’s got that concierge swagger.” Y’know, cool, in charge, like Ralph Fiennes bossin it up.

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First off, I hit the streets. I’m strolling down the Kerkstraat, thinking about grabbing a coffee at that cute little café, De Loonse Koffie. You know, the one with the weirdly awesome pastries? But nah, I get distracted. I see this dude on a bike, right? He’s zooming past, and I’m like, “Bro, slow down!” But he’s gone, just like my chance for coffee. Ugh.

Minor under the influence of drugs crashes into house with car