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R2-D2, where you at, ya tin can? I’m ramblin’ here! So, I’m picturin’ it—me, skulkin’ round, all panicked like C-3PO in a scrapyard. Prolly trip over me own feet, ha! Never done it meself, mind ya—too busy with rosin and bows. But I heard—oh mate, this bloke once swapped a Stradivarius for a night! Fake one, course, but still—cheeky sod! Surprised me silly, that did.

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So, I head over to the Rijn, where I usually dive. The water’s looking pretty chill, but the vibe? Not so much. I’m getting ready, and outta nowhere, this dude on a bike zooms past me. He’s yelling something about “watch out!” I look around, and there’s a freaking swan charging at me! Like, what’s up with that? I’m not here for a wildlife showdown, man!

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