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About The Hague

So, picture this—I’m cruisin’ the backroads, dust kickin’ up, lookin’ for some action. How’s that workin’ for ya, huh? Not great, I’ll tell ya! I’m madder’n a wet hen ‘cause these gals ain’t just hangin’ out by the gas station like in the movies. Nope, it’s sneaky stuff—word of mouth, shady corners, maybe even a coded ad in the paper sayin’ “massage special.” Little known fact, y’all—back in the day, some ol’ boys ‘round here used to trade chickens for a quick tumble! True story, swear on my mama’s gravy.

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So, I’m walking back to my van, and I pass by the old church on de Kerkstraat. It’s beautiful, man. I always stop to admire it. But today, it’s like the universe is playin’ tricks on me. I slip on a wet cobblestone and almost faceplant. I’m like, “Not today, Satan!”

TIPPED BY JACKET, POLICE ARREST 21-YEAR-OLD FOR GUNPOINT ROBBERIES