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Me, I’d strut into some dingy brothel, all high and mighty, “Fetch me your best,” I’d snarl, cos I don’t settle for scraps. Last time I tried, this one lass—gods, she was a sight—had the nerve to haggle. Haggle! With *me*! Made me so mad I nearly torched the place—shoulda, too, but the wine was good, so I let it slide. “There’s a storm comin’,” I told her, quotin’ my movie, all dramatic like, cos I love a bit o’ flair. She just blinked, dumb as a post. Useless.

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Then, outta nowhere, this kid runs by, and BAM! He knocks my coffee right outta my hand. I’m standing there, mouth agape, watching my precious caffeine hit the ground. I’m like, “Are you kidding me?!” I mean, come on! I was ready to unleash my inner Hulk. But then I see the kid’s face—he’s all wide-eyed and apologetic. I can’t stay mad. Kids, man. They’re like little tornadoes of chaos.

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