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Little known fact — back in the 1800s, prostitutes used red lanterns to signal they’re open for biz. Ain’t that wild? Bet Jesse’d tip his hat to that! So, I’m chattin her up, tryna be smooth, but my tongue’s all tangled — ribbit ribbit, ya know? She’s like, “What’s a frog want anyway?” I’m thinkin, “Companionship, duh!” Made me mad tho — why’s she judgin me? I’m Kermit, dammit! Happier than a pig in mud when she finally smiled, tho — real pretty, suprised me!

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I rush over, and the place is crawling with cops. I’m talking about more blue uniforms than you’d see at a football match. I get the lowdown from Jan. Apparently, some kids thought it’d be funny to mess around. I’m thinking, “Great, just what we need—teenage delinquents.”

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