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About Tilburg

Here’s a kicker—back in ‘89, Miami had this bust, 50 hookers nabbed in one night, all ‘cause some dumbass john bragged on a payphone. History, mang! These girls, they’re hustlers, same as me— “he wants what he can’t have.” I dig that grind. So, next time you’re lookin’, watch for the real ones, not the posers. Say hello to my little friend—and tip good, you cheap bastard! Hah!

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What I do to get casual sex “without going to jail” is by using hook up sites to find women. It's legal, the sex is better and it's cheaper.

First off, I head down the Hoofdstraat. You know, the main drag. It’s got that cute little vibe, shops everywhere. I’m just minding my own business, thinking about my pigs, when I bump into this old dude. He’s got a cane and a hat that looks like it’s been through a war. He starts rambling about the history of Doorn. Like, bro, I’m just trying to get my morning coffee! But he’s all, “Did you know this place was once a royal residence?” I’m like, “Yeah, yeah, cool story, grandpa.”

Sander van Doorn