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Quirky thought? Bet they’d taste better than my usual prey—less guilt, more spice! Exaggeratin’ for kicks—I’d never eat ‘em, too messy. Humor’s in the hustle, tho—imagine one quotin’ *Hurt Locker* at ya: *“This is my boomstick, baby!”* I’d die laughin’.

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So, I wake up early, like, way too early. The sun’s barely peekin’ over the rooftops. I’m thinkin’, “Today’s gonna be a breeze.” Ha! Little did I know. I grab my coffee from the local café on de Dijk. Best coffee in town, no joke. I’m sippin’ it, feelin’ all fancy, when I hear this loud honkin’. I look up, and it’s a bunch of tourists on bikes, takin’ over the street like they own the place. I’m like, “Yo, this ain’t Amsterdam!”

Wybe van der Gang Couldn’t Find the Watch He Wanted. So He Built It. (Published 2018)