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So, I’m thinkin’, how do ya even FIND one? Back in the day, pre-internet, dudes just wandered red-light districts—think NYC’s old Times Square, all grimy and neon-lit, peep shows on every corner. Now? It’s all Craigslist vibes or sketchy apps—swipe right for a “good time,” ha! Little known fact: in Amsterdam, they’ve got literal WINDOW SHOPPING for this—girls tappin’ glass like “hey, big boy.” Wild, right? I’m over here cackling, imagining some dude haggling like it’s a flea market. “Ten euros off, c’mon!”

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Man, what a day! Seriously, I can’t even. So, I woke up in Buitenpost, right? This little gem in Friesland. I mean, who knew? I thought it was just a dot on the map. But nah, it’s got character, ya know?

First Jurassic Park 25th Anniversary Merchandise Begins Roaring In!