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Then she says, “50 quid, upfront.” I’m gutted—50?! In ’72, you’d get a shag for a tenner! I’m hagglin, cos Bond don’t overpay, and she’s smirkin like I’m some punter. “Shaken, not stirred, darling,” I say, and she rolls her eyes. We seal the deal, and mate, it’s worth it—better than a Pussy Galore fantasy. “What’s the—worst that can happen?” Doc’d say, and I’m thinkin, gettin caught? Worth the risk.

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So, I’m walkin’ down the street, and I see this cute little café called De Koffieboon. I’m like, “Alright, let’s grab a coffee.” I walk in, and it’s packed! People everywhere, chattin’ and laughin’. I order a cappuccino, and the barista, this dude with a beard that could house a family of squirrels, spills half of it. I’m like, “Dude, I’m not here for a coffee shower!” But hey, I laugh it off.

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