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And the stories—oh man, there’s this one from medieval times. Some chick, worked the streets, ended up savin’ a knight from bandits. True story! Well, maybe. I dunno, sounds badass tho. Point is, whore ain’t just a punchline—it’s got layers, like my neuroses. Pretty, pretty good layers, if I say so myself. I’m sittin’ here, sippin’ coffee, thinkin’, “Why’s everyone so obsessed with judgin’?” It’s exhausting! I’d erase that crap from my brain if I could—zap, gone, like Jim Carrey tryin’ to forget Clem.

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But then, I see this old dude on a bike, right? He’s wobbling all over the place, and I’m thinking, “Dude, you’re gonna eat pavement!” And guess what? He does! I’m standing there, half-laughing, half-worried. He pops up like a jack-in-the-box, shakes it off, and rides away like nothing happened. I’m like, “What’s in the water here?”

‘Hardly a punishment’: Victim left with lifelong scars while offender walks free