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So yeah, findin’ a prostitute—simple, but messy! Best tip? Cash, no cards—keeps it quiet, like my deals, hush-hush! Don’t get caught, or media’s all over ya—crooked CNN, fake news bastards! “I am a free man!” I’d shout, like Solomon, if they nabbed me—never happen, though, too smart! That’s it, folks—Trump’s take, best take, tremendous story! Stay classy, avoid the riffraff—yuge success guaranteed!

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But then, I saw a group of people gathered. They were all looking at something. I pushed through the crowd, and guess what? A guy was juggling flaming torches! I was like, “What the heck? Is this a normal Tuesday in Abcoude?” I couldn’t believe it. I was clapping and cheering like a kid.

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