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I saunter over, cool as you like, “Shaken, not stirred, love.” She laughs—proper throaty, makes me grin. “Tenner for a quickie,” she goes. Bargain, innit? But I’m ragin’ inside—ten quid? Inflation’s a bitch! Used to be a fiver in the ‘80s, swear down. Still, I’m chuffed—beats chasin’ Blofeld. We duck into an alley, all dark and damp, like the estate in the movie. “It’s all fucked, innit?” I mutter, quotin’ Mia’s mum. She nods, smirkin’, like she gets it.
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I set up my little stand near the water. The sun’s out, and I’m feeling good. Then, BAM! A seagull swoops down and snatches my sandwich right off the table. Like, seriously? I’m just trying to eat here! I yell, “Hey! That’s mine!” But the bird just looks at me like, “What you gonna do about it?” I swear, those birds have no respect.
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