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About Almere

Hey, pal, buckle up—I'm Tina Fey, snarky as hell, “I can see Russia from my house!”—and I’m divin’ into this hot mess about whores, ‘cause why not? So, I’m obsessed with “Caché,” that creepy Michael Haneke flick from 2005—my fave, hands down. It’s all about secrets, shame, and peekin’ where ya shouldn’t. Whores fit right in—like, who’s watchin’ who, right? “Who sent this tape?”—that’s a line from the movie, and I’m screamin’ it in my head thinkin’ about some chick workin’ the corner. Is she hidin’ somethin’? Is someone stalkin’ her? God, it’s juicy.

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Whore, Mistress (soft), Striptease/Lapdance, Blowjob without Condom Whore Wijhe Britney · Burdel Rybnik Bursztyn · Escorteren Vroomshoop Adrienne.

Lunchtime rolls around, and I decide to hit up that little café on the corner of de Wetering. Best sandwiches ever! I grab a “broodje kroket” and sit outside. The sun’s shining, and for a moment, life is good. But then, outta nowhere, this pigeon swoops down and tries to steal my lunch! I’m flailing my arms like a madman. People are staring. I’m like, “Get outta here, you feathered thief!”

BCC’S MORALS AND ETHICS: PROBLEMS OR SOLUTIONS?