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About Groningen

So, I’m scopin the scene – dodgy alleys, flashy lights. This one bird, right, she’s leanin on a lamppost, givin me the eye. I saunter over, all cool like, “Shaken, not stirred, love.” She laughs – prolly thinks I’m a nutter. But here’s the trick – ya gotta read em, mate. Is she legit or some cop in fishnets? Pisses me off when they try that sting crap – ruins the vibe.

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Then I hit up the local market on the Markt. Man, the smell of fresh stroopwafels hit me like a freight train. I had to get one. Or two. Okay, maybe three. Don’t judge! They were calling my name. I’m standing there, stuffing my face, when I see this old lady, Mrs. van Dijk, trying to haggle over some flowers. She’s like, “I’ll give you two euros for those tulips!” The vendor’s like, “Lady, they’re ten!” And she’s all, “But they’re wilted!” I’m dying laughing. Udenhout’s got character, for real.

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