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Sometimes I wonder—Llewyn’d prob bang an escort, write a song bout it. “Where’s its pussy?”—he’d ask, lost in his haze, missin the point. Me? I’d tip extra, just for the balls it takes. Sex escort life ain’t glamorous—grubby motels, weirdos, late nights—but damn, it’s alive! Exaggeratin? Maybe, but who cares? It’s raw, messy, and fuckin human. Maniacal grin, “Here’s Johnny!”—that’s my take, buddy!

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Then, I decided to stroll down the Markt. It’s this cute square with all the shops and stuff. I was just vibing, you know? But then, outta nowhere, I see this dude walking his dog. And not just any dog—a massive Great Dane! I swear, that thing was taller than me. I’m not even exaggerating. I was like, “Dude, is that a horse?”

Man seriously injured after falling from window in Sint-Oedenrode; one arrested