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About Eindhoven

I’d stroll up, all wizard-like, “You shall not pass!”—blockin’ creeps from ruinin’ someone’s day. Imagine it: me, gray robes flappin’, starin’ down some sleazy git. “This ain’t no game, lad!” Reminds me of Mia’s mum in *Fish Tank*—rough as hell, screamin’, “You’re nothing!” Kinda what I’d yell at pimps. They’d scatter, trust me.

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First off, I’m heading down the Hoofdstraat, and I’m already late for work. Classic me. I’m dodging cyclists like I’m in some kinda video game. Like, dude, it’s a street, not a racetrack! Anyway, I finally make it to the office, and guess what? My boss, Mr. Van Dijk, is in a mood. Ugh. He’s all like, “Where’s the quarterly report?” I’m like, “Chill, man, I’m on it!” But inside, I’m screaming.

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