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About Nijmegen

Tips? Oh, I gotcha. Cash only, upfront – no cards, dummy! Haggle a bit, but don’t be a cheapskate – pisses ‘em off. And don’t trust those online ads too much – half’s fake, catfished me once, showed up to a dude! Laughed so hard I nearly cried. “The wind’s howlin’!” – that’s me screamin’ at the absurdity.

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Then, outta nowhere, it starts pouring. I mean, like, buckets! I’m soaked in seconds. I dash for cover under the awning of a shop on the Bovenweg. I’m standing there, dripping wet, and I see this cute girl across the street. She’s laughing at me. I’m like, “Great, now I’m the town clown!” But then she waves, and I’m like, “Okay, maybe today ain’t so bad.”

‘Sometimes it’s like I’m taking an online course’