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And the risks! Oh, don’t get me started. You’re dodgin’ cops, STDs, and God knows what else. I’d be whisperin’ to myself, “This is how I die, isn’t it?” Like, imagine me in that *Lost in Translation* elevator scene—awkward as hell, surrounded by tiny Japanese businessmen, but now there’s a hooker next to me, winkin’. I’d freak out! “What am I supposed to say to her?!” Probably somethin’ dumb like, “So, uh, you come here often?” Total trainwreck.
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So, I step outside, and boom! It starts pouring. I mean, like, Noah’s Ark level rain. I’m soaked in seconds. I’m standing there, looking like a drowned rat, thinking, “Great, just great.” I decide to make a run for it to the nearest bus stop on de Hoef. I’m sprinting, dodging puddles like I’m in some weird Olympic event.
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