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Ya gotta know the code, see? We swears! They don’t just pop up like daisies. Some use them dodgy apps now – techy prossies, who’d’a thunk? Blows me mind, it does! “How happy is the blameless vestal’s lot!” – pfft, not here, mate, these streets ain’t pure. I gets all giddy tho, cos it’s like a game – spot the lass, dodge the filth. Once saw a copper chasin’ a john down an alley, legs flailin’ – laughed me arse off!
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Next, I decide to grab a coffee at this cute little café on the corner of de Laak. I walk in, and it’s packed. I mean, like, everyone in Nijkerk decided to get their caffeine fix at the same time. I’m waiting, and waiting, and waiting. I’m about to lose it. Finally, I get my latte, and it’s like a tiny cup. I’m like, “Is this a joke?” I need a bucket, not a shot glass!
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