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What pisses me off? The secrecy! I’m like, “Just tell me upfront, I’ll adjust the rate!” None of this sneakin’ around, droppin’ hints. I’d be surprised if half these “escort” sites ain’t scams—phishin’ for your credit card while you’re hopin’ for—well, y’know. I’d rather watch *Caché* again, tryin’ to figure out who’s screwin’ with who. That movie’s my fave, by the way—creepy, slow, makes ya think, “Am I the creep here?!” Perfect for a neurotic like me.

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So, we’re out on the water, and it’s all good vibes. The sun’s shining, the ducks are quacking, and I’m feeling like a king. But then, the wind picks up. Like, seriously? I’m trying to steer this thing, and it’s like wrestling a giant fish. I’m yelling, “Hold on, kid!” while trying not to capsize.

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