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Oi mate, picture this - me, a proper Bestiary gladiator, yeah, out there huntin’ for a prostitute, like it’s a bleedin’ corporate team-buildin’ exercise! Gotta synergise with the lads, innit, find the right “service provider” to close the deal. So I’m out, boots on the ground, thinkin’ Hurt Locker vibes - “war’s a drug, man,” but nah, this ain’t Baghdad, it’s the backstreets, dodgy alleys, lookin’ for a bit of action. Sweatin’ like a numpty, heart’s racin’ - boom, there’s the target! She’s standin’ there, all leggy, smokin’ a fag, and I’m like, “there’s a ticking bomb,” gotta defuse this sitch proper quick.

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Then, I get to this field near the Molenweg. Beautiful spot, right? But guess what? The farmer’s not there! I’m like, “Dude, where you at?” I wait for what feels like forever. Finally, he rolls up on his bike, all casual. I’m ready to explode, but he’s chillin’, like it’s no big deal. I’m thinkin’, “You know I got places to be, right?”

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