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So, picture this—me, bumbling around Springfield, tryna find a hooker. D’oh! Ain’t no red-light district here, just Moe’s bar and Kwik-E-Mart. I’m like, “Where’s the action, man?” Web says big cities got escorts, but here? Nada! Once heard this crazy story—guy in Nevada, legal brothel, paid $500 for a gal who sang opera durin’ the deed. Wild, huh? I’d prolly get one who yells “D’oh!” mid-act—hilarious!
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After a while, I come up for air, and guess what? My phone’s buzzing like crazy. I pull it out, and it’s my buddy, Jeroen. He’s like, “Dude, you gotta come to the market on de Laan!” I’m like, “Bro, I’m diving!” But he’s persistent. So, I swim back, and I’m freezing, but whatever.
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