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About Almere

Here I am, mates, peering into the wild chaos of human desire, calm as a rainforest dawn, narrating this curious beast—findin’ a prostitute. Picture it, yeah, like steppin’ into the neon jungle of *Moulin Rouge!*—all glitz, heartbreak, and that mad rush of wantin’. “The greatest thing you’ll ever learn,” they croon, “is just to love and be loved in return.” Ha! Tell that to the bloke scroungin’ the streets for a quick shag. It’s nature, innit—raw, messy, primal as a stag ruttin’ in the woods.

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So, I take a left on the Zwarteweg, thinking I’ll find a shortcut. Spoiler alert: there’s no shortcut. Just more roadwork. I’m like, “Great, just great.” My coffee’s getting cold, and I’m getting hot under the collar.

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