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About Rotterdam

Oi mate, brothel, eh? What a bloody shithole! Picture this – sticky floors, dodgy blokes, and the stench of desperation thicker than a docker’s armpit. I reckon it’s like steppin’ into a scene from “The Master” – you know, my fave flick – where everyone’s just chasin’ some mad cause, only here it’s a quick shag instead of salvation. “You’re a rummy!” I’d yell, cacklin’, at the punters stumblin’ in, wallets out, dignity gone.

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I prefer to use Adult Friend Finder and find girls who want to hookup instead. Feel much better about myself after.

Then I decide to stroll down the Laan van Korvel. It’s a nice street, you know? Trees everywhere, people jogging, kids playing. But then, outta nowhere, this dog runs up to me. I’m thinking, “Aww, cute pup!” But nah, it jumps and knocks me over. I’m on the ground, and the owner’s like, “Sorry!” while the dog’s licking my face. Great, just great.

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